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Monday, July 25, 2005

Ricky Williams

I read earlier today that Ricky Williams showed up, hat in hand, at the Dolphins training camp, the camp for the same team he dishonorably abandoned to smoke pot and "discover himself" by living in a tent in Australia, travelled to India, and engaged in other navel-gazing activities. What he ultimately discovered is that he didn't like being poor, and he damned sure didn't like being sued for $8.6 million. Honestly, if I were Coach Saban, I might've been more than a little bit tempted to tell him where to get off. I would be more than a little bit surprised if the thought didn't at least cross his mind. So, little Ricky decides to come back with his head bowed and a prayer in his heart that the Dolphins will drop their lawsuit, while instead of receiving the very lucrative pay he would've received had he stayed last season, he's getting the league minimum. Well done, Mr. Williams, well done. You have done what even Daryl Strawberry and Jose Canseco have failed to do. You managed to not only fuck up your life, but also make a complete and total laughingstock out of yourself in the process, by doing only one thing.

But Mr. Williams, I do thank you for one thing: At least you're only one person, and did not manage to somehow talk, say, the entire players' union into a grand exhibit of pomposity and tactical retardation. You, being only one person and acting on behalf of only yourself, were only able to really fuck yourself up and maybe (okay, PROBABLY) the 2004-05 season for the Miami Dolphins. But, that being said, at least you didn't cost the entire NFL a full season. No, that mark goes to the owners and the players of the NHL. So thank you, Mr. Williams, for not being an even bigger fuckup and for having possible intoxication to blame on your actions. As far as I know, the NHLPA and NHL owners were completely sober during their months of stupidity.


Anonymous said...

That's a little harsh. So he goes out and smokes pot and finds himself, and screws up a FOOTBALL team's season.

(But yeah, it does suck that some people lost their jobs probably because of him)

Mandelbrot's Chaos said...

A little harsh? I think it was actually very harsh, but a fair assessment of the situation. I even object to the fact that what he did fulfilled the stereotype of the hippies, at least for a while, and they were pretty much over by the mid-70s.